Your Working-Day Emotion Checklist


     The following is from Matt Groening's Life In Hell. It loses something without the pictures, but it's still valid.

9:00    Pure grumpiness
9:05    Caffeine Jolt-o-Rama
9:29    Early-morning stupefaction
9:45    Splitting headache #1
10:04    Momentary panic-attack
10:31    Caffeine overdose
10:37    Perverted daydreams
10:42    Mid-morning numbness
10:52    Sudden fit of hostility
11:03    Lingering sulkiness
11:09    Pretending to work
11:33    Rebuffed flirtation with co-worker
11:35    Temporary dementia
11:57    "Head in a vise" feeling
12:00    Joyless lunch-eating
12:09    Mirthless joke-telling
12:23    Belching discontent
12:35    Sudden awareness of one's shallowness
12:47    Waves of nausea
1:00    Resentment of others
1:19    Early afternoon catatonia
1:25    Splitting headache #2
1:42    Gnawing of the bowels
1:52    That "no way out" feeling
2:06    Strange trance-like state
2:30    Urge to murder boss
2:49    Fooling around at the copy machine
2:55    Whining to the person next to you
2:59    Unrealistic plans to quit this lousy job
3:09    Mid-afternoon torpor
3:14    Even more perverted daydreams
3:36    Emotional deadness
3:47    Watching the clock
3:59    Worrying about senility
4:01    Splitting headache #3
4:09    Fear of getting fired
4:25    Lottery fantasies
4:33    Contemplating TV tonight
4:59    Uncontrollable jumpiness
5:00    Temporary perkiness