I recently finished up teaching Comp 4, the computer literacy
course here at UNC, during a compressed summer session. Comp 4 is
an introductory class that assumes NO knowledge of computers among
its students, and believe me when I say that this was often the
case. The class was great fun to teach, and one of the facets that
made it interesting (day-in and day-out) was the wealth of new
knowledge that the students imparted to me on tests and
examinations. I thought that I'd share some of these nuggets with
you. My comments are in the standard C delimiters (/* and */).
Your comments are encouraged. Here goes:
1. Bacchus invented FORTRAN.
/* I knew FORTRAN was old, and that it may have been designed
under the influence of alcohol, but... */
2. C is a logical programming language.
/* <rim shot> */
3. Doctors use computers to create a three demential picture of
a person's brain.
/* Is this classic, or what? */
4. Having the computer automatically fill in images for animation
is called "spleening."
/* Derivation: Most likely "splines" + "tweening." */
5. Heuristics (from the French heure, "hour") limit the amount of
time spent executing something. [When using heuristics] it
shouldn't take longer than an hour to do something.
/* An absolutely terrific "false cognate." */
6. Macs are compatible with each other.
/* Imagine the alternative: "What's your Mac's serial number?
We'll go back to the warehouse and get your software." */
7. One kind of a hostile computer program is a Trojan.
8. One method of computer security is a phone line.
/* She qualified it later by adding, "You have to know the
number." */
9. Programming languages have specifictions.
/* Obviously this student has dealt with a few standards. */
10. There are three kinds of program statements: Sequence,
repetition, and seduction.
11. There are two types of graphics: Vector and rascal.
/* Otay... */
12. Video games are examples of fault-tolerant systems.
On one test, I gave the students some abbreviations and asked
them to tell me what they stood for. You won't believe the
creativity of a student in a test situation. For example, one of
the abbreviations was "fax", which really stands for "facsimile."
However, various Comp 4'ers said it stood for:
1. Fiber-optic Aided Xeroxing
2. Frequency Automatic X-rays
3. Fast Ass Xeroxing /* My favorite */
The students also had to hand in term papers, and these were
rife with interesting tidbits. I've clipped a few, quoted
verbatim:
1. "... footnotes present an interesting problem, which may be
solvable by Hypercad."
/* I assume the last term is the newest rage -- a free-form
database for designers. */
2. "... Linda, a blind girl, was able to attend public school due
to the aid of a speaking computer that taught her the basic
fundmamentals [sic] of grammar and spelling."
/* Linda may want to lend her computer out... */
3. "At the beginning of each season [Edwin] Moses teats himself
on computerized weight machines..."
/* Ouch! */
4. "The program is manufactured by Quantel, a Silicon Valley
company located in Clearwater, Florida."
/* A long valley, as my roommate put it. */
5. "The worst thing the Mac has to offer, is that cooperative
multi-tasking is not available to be used."