Dear Madam,
Enclosed find check in the amount of $250.00 for rent of your
apartment. I am not sending the amount agreed upon because when I
rented the apartment I was under the impression that:
1. It had never been occupied.
2. There was plenty of heat.
3. It was small.
Last night I found out that it had been previously occupied,
that there wasn't any heat and it was entirely too large.
Upon receipt of the note, the girl immediately returned the
check for $250.00 with the following note:
Dear Sir:
I cannot understand how you expect a beautiful apartment to
remain unoccupied indefinitely. As for the heat, there is plenty
of it, if you know how turn it on and if you don't have enough
furniture to fill it, don't blame me.