Billclintium, Bc
With a slick appearance and slimy texture, this element
undergoes a series of interesting changes when in hot water.
Budweisium, Ps
Has no taste or smell; is often indistinguishable from water.
Cabmium, Cb
Found in abundance, except when needed. Exists in two states,
in motion and at rest. When in motion, it cannot be stopped, no
matter what you do. Cabmium has a charge associated with it. The
charge is variable, and scientists have not determined the formula
for calculating it.
Canadium, Eh
Similar to Americium, but a little denser. Much more rigid.
Often called Boron.
Congress, Cg
Atomic number 525. Can never be found in a solution.
Innofensium, Pc
Precisely equal numbers of electrons, protons, neutrons,
leptons, quarks. Completely inert, utterly useless, but smells
like a rose.
Limbaughium, Lb
The heaviest known element. It possesses an ever-expanding
mass. Very white. Acidic. Emits heat but no light. Instantly
polarizes all elements that come in contact with it. Repels
protons and electrons; attracts only morons.
Newtium, Nt
Extreme irritant. Carries a strong negative charge. Does not
possess magnetic properties. Can be purchased cheaply.
Politicium, Po
Contains a great deal of gas. Similar to radon in that it can
reach lethal concentrations in the House.
Quaylium, Vp
Einsteinium it ain't.
Snot, Sn
Bonds forever with corduroy.