Pillow: Made of polyester fill material, down, foam rubber, or
other soft materials.
Girlfriend: Sugar, spice, and everything nice? Or pure evil? You
be the judge.
Pillow: Can be stolen by girlfriend.
Girlfriend: Can not be stolen by pillow.
Pillow: Fighting with pillow is fun.
Girlfriend: Fighting with girlfriend is not.
Pillow: Not much fun when wet.
Girlfriend: Reported to be otherwise.
Pillow: Considered acceptable to drool upon.
Girlfriend: Not considered socially acceptable to drool upon, in
most circles.
Pillow: Does not need feeding.
Girlfriend: Needs feeding on regular basis, usually can cook
though.
Pillow: $12.95 at Caldor.
Girlfriend: $150 in cash, minimum one hour, from "Blue Moon Escort
Referral" (976-BABE)
Pillow: Normally silent.
Girlfriend: Makes giggling noises.
Pillow: Batman does not have one.
Girlfriend: Batman has one.
Pillow: Won't get mad at making up of "Pillow versus ..." lists.
Girlfriend: Will get VERY mad at the making up of "Girlfriend
versus ..." lists.