GNU GNURM

FSF announces GNU GNURM, the new, improved network worm!
Tired of old, outdated, buggy worms clogging up your system? Then be happy to know that FSF, the people who've done more to destroy intellectual property that anyone else, are proud to announce the release of GNURM 1.0. Even better, GNURM is being released into the public domain (and the public data networks), so it's absolutely free. You don't have to go and get GNURM, GNURM will come and get you!

Using advanced techniques that could only be programmed by people who have grants, trust funds, or other means by which they don't have to work for a living, GNURM roams the networks, using little known bugs, stupid errors by Sysadms, and other methods that you couldn't possibly understand to ensconce itself in your system.
Once there, GNURM provides your system with the many benefits that the FSF has decided you need!

1.    GNURM updates all your old, tired utilities to the brand-new, shiny, GNU versions!
2.    GNURM's advanced AI frees your software from the bondage of copyright laws by seeking out and destroying any copyright statements in the code or source (thus saving valuable disk space). GNURM's special GNUTRON BOMB feature destroys intellectual property rights, while leaving the code standing!
3.    Best of all, when GNURM has finished, it moves itself onto your friends computer, spreading goodwill and copylefts everywhere it goes.

Don't waste time, get GNU'd today!

Processor cycles are precious things, and it takes a lot of them to crack your root password. This could result in some slowdowns for your friends as GNURM tries to access your system. Don't be impolite. Change your root password to GNU today! You'll be glad you did tomorrow!